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04:44pm 25/09/2006
Certain ideas of mine have no exact English words with which to express them. In the absence of an exact word I tend to use the closest, most poetic word. Since my usage of the words sufficiently differs from what people commonly think when they hear the words, I felt that a lexicon was in order. My definitions are crafted to include but expand upon the common definitions of the words.

thought-form: any neurological activity which makes its way into what we call the mind. All memes are thought-forms, but not all thought-forms are memes.

Beauty: the quality of a thought-form which attracts a subject.

Ugliness: the quality of a thought-form which repels a subject.

Love: the state a subject experiences toward a beautiful thought-form.

Fear: the state a subject experiences toward an ugly thought-form.
music: Tool, Lateralis album
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04:43pm 28/03/2006
( You are about to view content that may only be appropriate for adults. )
music: Girls of Porn
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03:16pm 06/09/2005
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Journey into Boynton Canyon  
09:16am 12/07/2005
We started onto the forested hiking trail into Boynton Canyon after nightfall. I would have preferred to have used only the illumination of the full moon, but cloud cover made it so that I had to use a flashlight occasionally to ensure that we were on the correct trail. We eventually made it to the red mountainous rock structure that we were seeking, and climbed to the top of it. The light of the moon as diffused through the thin clouds was sufficient for the task of climbing. While we were perched upon the apex, the clouds parted and vibrantly illuminated the entire canyon in moonlight. We passed our time alternating fluidly between quiet observation and conversation regarding things philosophical and spiritual. Lightning storm clouds then rolled in over the canyon. The drizzle was so light and warm that it was completely negligible. The lightning show surrounded us in all directions of the horizon, and was quite spectacular. After the storm rolled past us the canyon was once again bathed in moonlight. We eventually made our way back out of the canyon, but I left with a measure of that beauty permanently imprinted within my soul.
music: soft roll of distant thunder
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08:50pm 06/07/2005
Speeding through curvy mountain roads in the foggy dark of night with harsh music blaring is quite an adrenaline rush. Everyone should have such an experience at least once in their life. It's like playing a racecar videogame, except if you crash there's no Reset button. I would actually take my eyes off the road long enough to glimpse the splendor of the mountains, but I very strongly recommend against doing that at the speeds I was going and especially in such foggy conditions. When I finally do pass over into the Afterlife and meet my guardian angel, I will find this creature with a nervous twitch and only tufts of hair remaining on her head, and she will be muttering incoherently. After guarding me against my own recklessness, she will consider Hell to be a vacation.
music: ChroniX Aggression (internet radio)
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Imagination and Beauty  
11:17pm 29/06/2005
In its most raw form, creation is totally random and chaotic. A notion of quality is then required to differentiate the patterns that emerge from chaos. Within a sapient mind, imagination is the fundamental creation mechanism for thought-forms. At its deepest layer imagination is chaotic, and slightly above that is a subconscious layer that we could call intuition, which in this scenario is the part of our minds which first applies a notion of quality. We use our intuition to draw forth specific thought-forms from the limitless chaos of imagination. Imagination is the seed of Brahmic divinity within us.
Every thought-form can have one of two qualities: we can be either repelled away from it or drawn toward it. (For academic thoroughness, a thought-form can be neutral.) Fear is the best name to give this repulsion from negative thought-forms, and love is the best name to give to this attraction to positive thought-forms. When fear rules your life, your mind manifests and fixates upon negative thought-forms. When love rules your life, your mind manifests and fixates upon positive thought-forms. Fear is designed to move one away from a state of ugliness, and love is designed to move one towards a state of beauty. The problem with fear however is that it creates ugly thought-forms, and if the individual is not balanced with love then the only thought-forms that they are creating are ugly ones. Reality in a state ruled by fear becomes ugly. Reality in a state ruled by love becomes beautiful. The ugliness currently in our world can be traced to fear within human hearts. If you want to live in a beautiful world though, you will have to help create it by embracing love to make your inner world beautiful and radiating that beauty out into the outer world through the choices you make.
music: Tool, Lateralis album
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Systemic Evolution  
10:55pm 24/06/2005
The evolution of any system towards a higher state of quality requires three mechanisms: the creation of new patterns, the preservation of patterns of highest quality, and the destruction of patterns of lowest quality. I am fond of pointing out that hundreds of years ago the Hindus deified the mechanisms of systemic evolution as Brahma the Creator, Vishnu the Preserver, and Shiva the Destroyer. Had Western philosophers employed the ideas of the East, they could have easily formulated the theory of evolution for biological systems long before Darwin found the need to begin "reinventing the wheel", so to speak. The principles of systemic evolution can be applied to any dynamic system of patterns though, not just living organisms. Computer programmers have been inspired by Darwin's biological version of systemic evolution to create what they call genetic algorithms, which enable profoundly powerful simulations of complex natural phenomena such as fluid turbulence. Legal systems qualify as dynamic systems of patterns as well. Imbalance among the mechanisms can push a system into a state of meaninglessness, stagnation, and eventually oblivion. A legal system which lacks an adequate internal application of the mechanism of destruction [and most if not all are this way] will become bogged down by obsolete and ineffectual laws and eventually contribute to societal collapse. The cycle of systemic evolution also applies, perhaps most importantly, to the belief system of an individual. If you are not using your imagination to create new ideas and using your intellect to destroy obsolete ones, then you will stagnate.
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04:18pm 03/04/2005
Once upon a time, humans lived in harmony with the Earth. Then in Mesopotamia a culture decided that it was going to conquer the world. They brutally expanded their cultural empire by either forcing their neighbors to assimilate into their culture or by outright slaughtering their neighbors. Over the course of ten thousand years this cultural conquest has covered the globe, with only small pockets of aboriginal cultures remaining unassimilated. The seemingly diverse modern cultures of the world all share one common metacultural trait which began in Mesopotamia: they all believe that the world belongs to humans. This belief has a corollary: that the individual is separate from the world around it. These beliefs of separation and ownership have justified all atrocities against fellow humans and Earthly inhabitants. The reason that the ancient ecologically harmonious cultures of the world fell under this conquest is because as a collective they lacked a cultural immune system.
As a visual metaphor, let us label the warlike Mesopotamian culture as "black", and the ecological cultures as "white". The "black" culture successfully conquered the peaceful "white" cultures due to their lack of militarism. What was needed was an immunological "gray" culture. A gray culture appears for all intents and purposes as a "white" culture under normal conditions. However, when a gray culture identifies a "black" culture, it enters immunological mode and annihilates the "black" culture, possibly destroying itself in the process. Had the ancient world been composed of gray cultures instead of "white" ones, then our current world would not be corrupted as it is by greed; we would not be living in a "black" world. Greed directly stems from the notions of separation and ownership. If humanity survives its current "black" cultural infection and returns to ecologically harmonious ways without first destroying itself and the ecology of the planet by its current path, then humanity will have to adopt the wisdom of gray culture, otherwise the cycle of global ecological devastation will begin again when another cultural infection arises. No sufficiently complex system, be it a peaceful global culture or a biological organism, can survive without an immune system.
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08:06am 28/03/2005
Due to how stubbornly self-absorbed and short-sighted humans are, I believe that an apocalypse is inevitable. Our consumption of resources and the damage that we inflict upon this planet will eventually accrue to the point where the very survival of our entire species upon this planet will come into jeopardy. At that point humans will viciously turn upon each other for control of dwindling resources. The timeframe over which this apocalypse will occur may span years or centuries, but the end result will still be the fall of our modern civilization as we know it. This apocalypse is fully avoidable, but it would take a unanimous decision by all of the peoples of the world to alter their lifestyles, which is not likely to occur. I fear that the best thing that the dreamers of the world can hope to do is to survive this apocalypse, so that their wisdom can be used to build a new world from the ashes of the old.
mood: still apocalyptic
music: Aenema, by Tool
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Memetic Infection (part 2)  
07:08pm 09/03/2005
Have you ever had those moments when you just feel that you do not belong in this world? ...That this world is just too fucked-up to be real? Everyone knows that there is something wrong with this world, with us humans, but how many people realize that the entire Earth was once a nearly Edennic paradise to our species? Eden was real, in a manner of speaking, and we are indeed the ones who "sinned" against it and against our fellow humanity, and who continue to do so today. Do you realize that you feel that you do not belong in this world because ancestors of yours decided that instead of belonging to the world that the world belonged to us? Ten thousand years ago our ancestors invented the notion of ultimate possession, and with it they justified their imperial conquest of the world and the horrors which they visited upon their fellow humans and the other inhabitants of the Earth. Possession and separation are the memes which infect us. This culture of possession is nearly completely global, and the small remaining aboriginal pockets of resistance are being either wiped-out or forced to assimilate as we speak. It is what Cain did to Abel (mythically), it is what the Mesopotamian city-states did to their neighbors, it is what the European colonialists did to the Native American populations, and it is what the world is currently doing to the South American aboriginal populations that live in the rain forests. This cultural infection and its attack on the environment will render this planet uninhabitable to us if we do not change paths.
mood: apocalyptic
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